~there are some things in life u cannot compromise~

Hi.
I am blogging from the company laptop, so there are no photo for this post.
I don't know whats going wrong inside myself, but seems facebook is no longer can bring amusement to me.
thinking off other activities that can fill my spare time.
first, ever think of learning guitar. but i don't want to do it half way.
plus, i don't think it can suit me well.
so, no guitar lesson.
then, think of beach vacation.
sunbathing. snorkeling.
but will think it back when i have enough money.
for the time being, just keep it as a dream.
there is another thing i wanna do..
actually i keep it since early of this year.
but i think i didn't find courage to do that.
if i want to do it, i have to do it alone.
maybe because of money and time constraints, so i have to stop dreaming about it as well.
i already do the first step, so all i need to do is wait and just wait.
there are many stuffs need to handle as we aging.
sometimes i think i wanna ask my brain to stop thinking.
just do what i wanna do without think the consequences.
it just i think too much.
sometimes, its okay to oversee things, but sometimes it makes me sick.
it makes u overdo it or wasting your time thinking about unnecessary things.
and you overlook things that you really need to care about.
maybe i was born to be that type of person, banyak fikir.
cant avoid it.
i always thinking about the outcome, what will be, why this way and not that way bla bla bla..
some friends try to make me on track again, they always said just let things be. go with the flow.
but i can't.
i am afraid of letting people down.
i think too much and sometimes its annoying.
its just insecure feeling.
life is like gambling anyway.
you may either rejoice or regret.